There is almost no physical difference between these two photos, except that the first one was taken nearly 7 years ago.
But what you can't see in the second photo is the triumph of overcoming things that once held me captive and kept me in bondage my entire life: the feelings of inadequacies, the feelings of worthlessness, and hopelessness, the reckless partying, consuming things that made me feel numb to the pain of this world. The voids in my life that I thought could only be filled by men and money (more specifically, buying things I could not afford to feel some kind of sense of happiness and worth).
Why do I share this with you? Shedding light on so many things most people would rather keep quiet about themselves? Because at some point, you have to decide if the pain you are living in is going to keep stopping you from moving forward with your life. You have to decide if you want to keep living the same dull, mundane life.
You can't see past your own pain and your own hurting sometimes. I get it. You are blinded and consumed by this self-pity life because you don't know how to escape what's going on in your own head. How do you escape when the thing that's tormenting you the most is you? You escape through outside things - sex, money, drugs, alcohol, and now, the added bonus of social media. You can escape your own emotional bondage through any one of those things, but at the end of the day, no matter how many different people you have sex with, no matter how much money you spend on new things, no matter the amount of drugs or alcohol you consume, no matter how much time you spend on social media thinking your life doesn't matter & you will never be great enough because you compare someone else's highlight reel to your real-life roller coaster life, you will always end up empty and alone. You will always end up less fulfilled than you were before you gave your body and your mind over to that "thing" that allows you to escape from your reality. Nothing changes until you do.
Don't know where to start?
Start here ⬇️
Fantastic panel discussion tonight about gender equality with @nadja.swarovski and the #SwarovskiFoundation including @jakhya_r and Erin. I loved the diversity of views and was so inspired by our @womenforwomenuk director Toure from the DRC - and Sir John Holmes spoke so powerfully about his experience as UN Under Secreatary General for Humanitarian Affairs! #inspiring#EqualityIsMyBusiness
.....great talk by industrial light and magic (ILM) this evening about how they contribute to the making of Star Wars films and an insight into the working methodology.....needless to say it fed my inner geek and the little boy in me who love these films.....just wow😳
YES. QUEEN. You are all angelssssss and I hope you know this about yourself. Idk I'm never gonna stop preaching about self love & women empowerment 🙌🏽
I don't know what I love MORE than uplifting someone/putting a smile on their face or knowing that I have made a positive influence in someone's life. I think that's why I'm obsessed with being a personal trainer. I am so blessed that I get to help my girls better themselves everyday, I swear. The fact that I get to watch them grow mentally & physically DAILY inspires me in ways I can't even explain 😻😻😻😻😻😻
HAPPY THURSDAY BABIES 💓 I hope you know how beautiful and unstoppable you are🙏🏽
A throwback to the shoot with @camcooke and @dannimcdowell where I had fully brown hair! 😀
I love these photo's because it shows the power of makeup and it's transformative effect. With a bold lipstick and some layering around the eyes I go from looking innocent to strong! A totally different person.
I'm going to experiment on myself this week with some of my own before and afters! I ❤ make-up!!!!
LENGTHLY ALERT; I have known Mike Zimmerman for years. He used to work for my dad who was flipping houses in the recession. Mikes have been a tile setter his entire life. If you had a chance to look at his knees, it would confirm he’s spent more hours on his knees that I have had my but in a chair(17 knee surgery’s). I started my first company HD Construction back in 2009 that’s when I met mike. I sold my first job that was a bathroom remodel contacted Mike to see if he would be able to handle the tile work for me and he assured me he could do it all; he told me just take care of the selections I got everything else. Fast forward eight years, six companies, and jump into present-day DMG. Mike came to me at the beginning of when we had just started DMG and asked me if I could teach him how to run projects and manage people because he knew how to do everything else. He wanted a chance to get on his knees to stop laying tile and start using his mind, soon project Managment came into the fold, and he was teaching about 2-3 guy’s a month and running projects about 3-5 a month. To date, mike is my right-hand man. Without him, DMG does not operate. No one works harder, longer or is more committed to the process than Mike. He is now in charge of our entire crew of about 27 guys. Running approximately 3m dollars worth of work. I have always talked with Mike about if I ever get the chance I’m going to buy you a truck, the reason being ever since I’ve known Mike he’s just had a work truck that was his only vehicle. As a single dad of 5 kids raised by him only. What he would always talk about how it was embarrassing pulling into restaurants and establishments with a work truck and his five kids, rather than a regular clean car. Well, recently I was able to come across a real estate transaction that allowed me some extra cash, besides tithing and giving to the church I wondered how else I could bless someone. Then last week my commercial rep with Duval Ford called me said, man, we got a killer deal on this 2010 Nissan Titan 4door 100k miles loaded. 13k out the door. This video is me giving Mike the truck. I love you mike. Your family. I love you like an older brother.
Here's to one of my favorite adventure/acro homies in the game! @homelessyogi and I always see eye to eye, because we're the same height. We're both dedicated practitioners with a great respect and understanding for our craft. If you see twaddle-dope and twiddle-damn doing arm to arm see-saws, you know that's us!
Hacer la banda sonora de 'Amanecer' (León Lacave) y de 'Lo que no se ve' (Lamberto Guerra) fue un regalo. Mañana nos vamos a Hendaya (Francia) a compartir nuestro trabajo, a celebrar que lo hicimos, que existen y que fueron posibles. Aún no han llegado y ya sé que van a ser unos días muy felices.
"The turning point is when you realize you can do the same things in practice as the others. And then you start to believe you could beat them in a real race " Such an inspiring speech by @hosszukatinka olympic champion swimmer at Mol smart validation day! Thank you!
[Inspired by @noraaxsa and @peterdevito ]
So i decided to do this thing because i saw Nora's post and I think that @peterdevito work is really inspiring. Months ago I really cared about what people thought about me, it made me sad and I thought that what they said was true. Now i don't care at all, and I'm used to hear people say those things but I just ignore them.
"Stupid": people think that I'm stupid and that they have the rights to treat me with superiority. No I'm not stupid and I also think that nobody is better than anyone else.
"Shut up": this is related to the previous one. They think I have no rights to talk, they don't listen to me, they find me boring or they overlap their voice to mine. Don't worry there are people that care about me and they listen to me.
"You're always sleeping": i have sleep disorders and I even sleep for only 3 hours a night. Because of this I'm always tired and spaced out.
"Weird": people call me weird because i like comics and animes, becuase I dye my hair (like...for real?), becuase i like kpop an many other things.
Last but not least
"Bad skin": this is not something that people say about me, but it's something I really hate about myself. I'm trying to fight against it but it's difficult and it takes time, and I'm also trying to accept it.
With this post i want to tell y'all that you should never let people bring you down and to surround yourself with people that just want to see you happy.